the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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