Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
nutella sex= disaster
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Randomize
