My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
