This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
