Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
