I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
