I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize
