Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
The uberlube is also flammable
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize