im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
