i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
worst night to have a conscience
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Randomize
