Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize
