My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
