I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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