you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
do herpes really smell.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize