saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize