i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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