my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
