i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
