the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize