My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Randomize