i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
It was confusing and full of hummus
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Randomize
