whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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