Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Randomize
