Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Randomize
