very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize