I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
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