I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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