Having a random hookup so left but love u
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Randomize
