That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Randomize
