what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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