Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
My penis needs a shock collar
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
