Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Randomize
