it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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