Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
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