Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
