found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
