One girl and one boy is just not enough.
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
