Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Randomize