69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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