All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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