Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Randomize
