Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
i want to swaddle you in tequila
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
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