Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize