What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
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