Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
