3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
Randomize