I'm lost and stupid without you.
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
