What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize
