i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
She told me I should be a condom model.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Randomize