Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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