so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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